As a child, I remember playing the video game ‘Street Fighter’, I liked the female fighters a lot and leaned in their direction for choice of players. Street Fighter allowed me to do things that could only happen in my imaginations. One of the female fighters always started a fight with the words, ‘Go easy on me’. I wondered why she said those words because she had the ability to fight any of the others. I guess it may just have been a tactics to play on the psychic of her opponent.

Those words ring true in our relationships with others. In the words of John Maxwell, “Everyone you come into contact with is fighting a battle”. Some people are going through hell, while others are in hell. If only we can see what goes on in the real world of others, maybe, just maybe, we will go easy on them.

There is a story commonly told about a man who had given up on life because nothing seemed to be working. He decided to take his life. As he attempted to commit suicide, a passerby observing what he was about to do asked if he could have his clothes. At that moment, he realised that even though he felt his life was bad, someone else was fighting a fiercer battle.

Unfortunately, our faces mask a million truths, our well-layered makeup hides a billion bruises and an ocean of tears. A lot of people around us are ‘walking problems’, carrying a burden that pulls them down daily, been dealt a hard blow by life. While some bounce back like a ball, others stay down for a long time or forever. Even though they say a problem shared is half solved, some problems remain a mystery hidden deep down in the heart. All you see are physical manifestations like silence, inexplainable anger, use of bad words, senseless confrontations, bitterness or sarcasm because ‘hurting people hurt people’. When you see the tip of the iceberg, remember that beneath the surface lies a different world that can only be summed up in two words ‘down’ and ‘out’.

An unanswered hello, a call not returned, a message not acknowledged should naturally trigger annoyance but why not give the benefit of doubt instead, clarify before jumping into conclusion and taking action. Life is hard enough, do not make yourself someone else’s prayer point; Heaven responds to persistent prayers. Do your part daily not to complicate the lives of the people that you meet. 

As I fight my battles and you fight yours, don’t compare, judge or try to figure me out; if you can’t lift me, leave me. If you have not walked in my exact shoes, you may never understand my tears, comprehend my battle cries or even my victory dance. There is always light at the end of the tunnel and joy indeed comes with the morning but while I wait, please go easy on me!

Note to self

‘Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another as God forgave you’.

Ephesians 4:32 (Bible)

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  • Toosh Baba

    As human, we can’t play God by trying to figure it all out. Then again, be the best you can be, not just to self but to others (brotherly kindness). It mayn’t be easy as grammar may make it seem. But you can always try.

    Deep one from the heart as always. Lovely read.

  • kemideangel

    Great word!. After reading through, I’ve decided to put a call through to one of my friends who has refused to pick my calls for sometime now to ‘give the benefit of doubt’ and avoid jumping into conclusion.
    I will always try to remember that “Everyone you come into contact with is fighting a battle”.
    Thank you so much.

  • Nancy Abraham

    Interesting…these words aptly explains an experience I had recently. Sometime last month when I thought I was under too much stress and pressure, I later found that a friend lost a loved one at a young age. The news just made my problem and concerns vanish like smoke. I’m learning to give benefit of doubt for even the most outrageous expressions… I’m still learning. May God help us all.

  • Solace

    You’re right ma’am. Thank you

  • Affiong John Abakasanga

    The words ” go easy on me” is a confirmation of a message I heard recently about me being ” slow to anger” exactly the same way God is. The world is not friendly at all, but as God’s representatives, we must show love, patience and understanding to the people around us and beyond.
    Thank you my Pastors for this reminder. I got value!
    Remain blessed.

  • Chidi

    This was a great read, thank you. I’m reminded of the greatest commandment in the Bible, Love!! show love to people as God Himself is Love!

  • MNO

    “As I fight my battles and you fight yours, don’t … try to figure me out” – that’s deep and as real as can be.

    Previously I’d get livid when I realise someone’s tryna figure me out; over time this has now evolved to pity for such persons ‘cos the results leaves them either frustrated the more or have them seemingly put me in a wrong box – often times to their detriment.

    Such an awesome piece of wisdom. Life is indeed beautiful …!

    Love 💗 & light!

  • Uduak Akpan

    Over the last 2 years I have adopted a slightly contrarian view. Our world is a really mean place and as Sylvester Stallone puts it in one of the Creed movies, it will beat you to the ground if you let it. I try to have very little expectation that people will “take it easy on me”. Quite frankly I now make the assumption that most people are innately bad but sometimes they do good, as against people being intrinsically good but sometimes they do bad things. I’d rather be suprised by integrity and a kind disposition than disappointed with ill-treatment.

    • MNO

      Zero expectation! The magic mindset 💪

      Love 💗 & light!


    “If you can’t lift me…leave me”. This is so simply yet so profound. If you have nothing uplifting or positive to say…say nothing. Indeed, everyone is fighting their own battles. Don’t ever be the reason why someone ends their lives. Rather be the reason why someone wants to live. Therefore, we should go easy on them. The world needs sensitivity, empathy and compassion.

    Thanks lifeandbecoming for this powerful read. Keep it coming!

  • Ifiok

    This is my favorite so far , thank you.

  • amieakp

    Thanks for this…Thank you 😊 💓

  • hbcrispy

    This piece reminds me of a simple Igbo proverb, “Onye na nke’ya”. It’s meaning suggests, you can’t swap your problems with another person’s. You’ll keep your problems, because when you hear other people’s problem, including the people you think are in “paradise”, you will realize that your condition is not worse. Hence, the need to go easy on other people and be kind. Well done ✅

  • Mfon

    True words – a good reminder on how we should sail through each day .
    Easy on me
    Easy on others.

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